July 9, 2012
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When the winter leaf falls.
When the winter leaf falls.
Contemplation
Yesterday the wheather was morbid. The cold begged from me to stay in bed rather than get up and do something productive. I thought a lot about death and dying. These were not morbid thoughts but an acknowledement of the cycles of life. Maybe it was a telephone call from my father that triggered me into the space of contemplating death. My father at the age of 73 sold his house an moved into a smaller unit with my mother. He has made a transition to old age smooth and is still part time running his own business. He phoned from me to get advice on how to invest the money he got for his house.
It is a difficult situation to give advice. If the advice does not work then I will be the culprit who must take the blame. So my strategy is rather to give my dad options and make the consequences of each as clear as possible so that he can make his own decision. He is mentally still totally capable to make up his own mind. My father's question was more than a question. His question is the start of a new phase and it reminded me that we are all just travelers through this world. I am reaching a new phase of maturity as well. In certain degree it is a harsh reality that life will not continue the way it does. I had a good life. I rarely had to face death head on in this life. When I look back at my life I was richly blessed, but we all will die. When I look back I still wonder whether my life was a worthy life. My concern was not about dying but about living. Life is a gift and my question is whether I am using this gift properly.
Comments (6)
Having gone through your father's "life phase"a decade ago (I'm about 10 years older than he is), I can relate to both you and him. In our case, we had no younger relative we chose to ask advice from - actually we are much more likely to advise them!
It's easy to become frustrated by the physical decline that accompanies old age, especially if you do not see yourself as "old". Until very recently, we (my wife and I) have not thought of ourselves as "old"and still have trouble remembering that our goals had better be short term ones. for example we recently re-roofed our house and the roof came with a fifty-year guarantee
We are pretty satisfied with the life we have lived - which I gather is not a sentiment shared by many our age.
I think deep down inside you are very happy with the family you have created on your own. So, I would say you have used this gift of life properly.
@tychecat - I am grateful to have your guidance and example to both motivate and encourage me. Thank you. Your responses are always valuable and appreciated.
@catstemplar2 - I am happy with my family. Looking at my children, I know they will be fine without me. They have the right attitude and are equiped to look after themselves. I often think they might even be older than me when one looks at their soul age. I am happy that they have all reached a age where they can take more responsibility for their own lives. Thank you Brother. You are much appreciated.
You can only give your father the best knowledge you know about the investment. Largely it is out of both your control. But you can put your heart and best intentions into the decision.
It is so good to be grateful. Death can be scary. but it is also part of life.
Thanks for sharing these thoughts.
Are you using the gift properly? I think you are. It is obvious in the way you care for your family. And you may not realize that by sharing your thoughts and experiences here, you are helping others, as well. You seem to me to be someone who genuinely wants to make the world a better place through your personal interactions with others. I think you're succeeding.
We are travelers - I couldn't agree more
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